Common Sense Wisdom


One of my great fascination in life are people and events that have changed or influence changes in the world. Abraham Lincoln and slavery; Martin Luther King and the civil rights; Nelson Mendela and apartheid; Mahatma Gandhi and India’s Independence; Tupua Tamasese Leolofi and the mau just to name a few. 

It seems these men had clarity of their mission in life of a peaceful and non-violent movement and had fortitude to see it through. The commonality among them was their faith in a greater power that brought them wisdom to guide them and strength to fulfill their sacred calling without fear.

Searching for clarity in my is a life-long goal in understanding what make things works.  It is a constant search to figure things out and to make sense of things. 

This begins with my relationship with Deity, my parents and siblings, then with my wife, on to my children and grandchildren. Now our lives have been overtaken and overwhelmed by our great grandchildren. What a joy they are in our lives!!!

I would like to leave them with somethings that I have learned along the way in this exciting journey we call LIFE…Hopefully, it will be their starting point and they can build upon it.

I called it ‘Common Sense Wisdom’. I hope it will be a source and a resource that they can go to when life becomes confusing as it sometimes does; With all my LOVE and may we all learn from these great men and their examples…

Joseph Toloa’i Ho Ching

I…..Blessings & Inspirations

A. All Blessings and Inspirations come from God! And…..they are free! Pass it on liberally and generously. To do otherwise will block and back up any new blessings and inspirations from coming our way. Share all and any of our blessings freely and prepare to receive more!

II…..Two Greatest Tools in Obtaining GOD’S Greatest Gift of ETERNAL LIFE!

A. The Gift of the Holy Ghost will warn and protect us, as well as inspire and direct us in ways that will bring us growth, safety, joy, peace, and freedom. The Atonement of Jesus Christ, not only forgives us of our sins, but take away all the infirmities, pain, obstacles, anxieties, and any discouragement we face in this life. If we totally trust these two TOOlS (gifts), they will bring us God’s greatest gift of ETERNAL LIFE. There will be nothing in this world that we cannot conquer, endure, or overcome. Sometimes, life is that simple!!!

III…The Right Way

A. The Lord’s way is finding solutions to our problems, the Devil is to make excuses, as well as rationalize. The Lord’s way will give us hope, the Devil’s despair. Do it right or His way and we will find Peace, Tranquility, and Joy!


A. Ask and you will receive; Seek and you shall find; Knock and it shall be open unto you. Remember to Always ASK and never stop BELIEVING!!! Grandpa Soliai taught us to never be afraid is ASK. A ‘no answer’ won’t kill you, but a ‘yes answer, will open many doors.


A. To Believe takes Faith and Faith can move mountains. That’s Powerfully simple and a simply Powerful FACT!

VI…..Fairness……shows we care, not only to what the Lord expects of us but also our sensitivity to the tender feelings of our brothers and sisters.  Not to mention that it is the right thing to do.

VII….Being a Victim

A. The line between being victimized and being a victim (feeling sorry for oneself) is very thin and a lot of times unintentionally crossed without one’s awareness.

      1. It is easier to pick oneself up and move forward when we have been victimized.
      2. Being a victim makes one stagnant and lethargic to the point where we stop growing and just want to wallow in negativity (self-pity).

B. We must constantly be aware and guard against the latter or we risk being in a quagmire and lose our ability to grow and prosper.

VIII….Entitlement Mentality

A. No one is owed anything by anyone. To feel entitle, only incapacitates our ability to grow and reaching our potential.


A. is the greatest trait to possess. Perfection is fleeting because we cannot duplicate and recreate that magic moment or action at command. Consistency is the simplest way to perfection. Work on one thing at a time and replicate them, over and over again, until perfection is achieved, one at a time.

X…..Structure is a necessity in life because it requires discipline.

A. One of the greatest and significant feelings we can experience, is setting a goal and accomplishing it. Without structure we’d feel empty, futile, and unfulfilled.


A. Just because we can do it, doesn’t always mean we should. Restraint and control requires DISCIPLINE and DISCIPLINE brings strength, order, clarity, and peace.

XII…..Service is real happiness

A. Try forgetting oneself and do something for someone else and see how happier you are. Just as ‘faith’ and ‘fear’ are incompatible, ‘service’ and ‘selfishness’ cannot co-exist!

XIII….Love and Compassion

A. These are greatest values because it requires service to others and respect for our elders, those in authority, and our environment.


A. This is the thrust and lift we need to soar above and overcome our trials, road-blocks, and moments of despair. Passion keeps hope alive. Despair kills ambition.


A. This is food for the soul. Our soul and spirit are most sensitive to inspiration when we have a grateful heart.

XVI…..Learn to Receive with a grateful heart, so when we Give it will be without strings attached. 

XVII…R.A.W. Solution to problems

A. Recognize the problem

      1. Understand and accept, it’s an imperfect world and there will always be problems. We are not alone!
      2. Denying (denial) there is a problem is lying and it will not solve anything, nor make the problem disappear.

B. Assess the problem

  1. Find the origin and cause of the problem
  2. Analyze and evaluate the pro(s) and con(s) / strengths and weaknesses

C. Work on solutions

      1. Dissect and review sections ‘A’ and ‘B’ to fully understand the problem
        • Mentally go over several possible scenarios that make sense, to move us closer to a solution to our problems. EXECUTE!!!
      2. Pray for inspiration
      3. Worrying is good if it moves us closer to the R.A.W. solution, otherwise it is a waste of good energy.

XVIII…Forgiveness….Fuel and energy for the soul because it not only cleanses our hearts, but clears our minds and vision so we can be inspired, grow, prosper and be at peace.  That is real and pure JOY!!!

XIX….Knowledge and Wisdom….Knowledge is what we learned from books and life experiences.  Wisdom is what the Lord grants to us through inspiration, so when Knowledge and Wisdom are combined they are called Common Sense.

XX….Gotta have My Twos***

A. One plus One will always equal Two. It doesn’t matter what language, or how many zeros or commas we add to it, it is basically a one plus one equation and it must equal two. Anything else does not/will not make sense! Simplify our life and we’d be able to do more.

XXI….Butt Theory (Separation Equals Respect)

A. We must create enough separation between us and our peers (competitors), otherwise they will pull us down and trample us senseless, if not worse. If all they can see is our ‘derriere’ and have accepted the fact they can’t reach us, they will want to kiss our Butt! That’s Respect!!!

XXII..Trials and Tribulations(T&T)

A. T&T are learning and teaching opportunities. We cannot be successful and prosper without, experiencing, these life’s phenomenon. Each time we wisely exercise our agency and overcome our T&T; wisdom, resiliency, and inner strength are just few of our rewards.

XXIII..The Ripple Affect

A. A pebble or anything thrown in a pond or still water will create a ripple affect, a nice orderly set of rings that starts from where the pebble hits the water (the smallest ring) and onward and outward, depending on the size of the object.

B. This phenomenon is guarded by eternal principles, as one circle cannot circumvent another, but must follow the order of the smallest circle moving to the next circle which is bigger and so forth until the last depending on the force.

C. The same principles apply to relationships (metaphorically);

    1. The first and most important circle should be between us and God
    2. The second circle should be between us and our spouse
    3. The third circle should be between parents and children
    4. The fourth circle should be between brothers and sisters.
    5. The next circle should be between us and uncles, aunts, cousins, friends, etc.

D. Whenever we feel confused and filled with anxiety, we need to go back to the first circle and work our way back to where we are. If we are good with our Heavenly Father, the other circles will work themselves out.

E. To do otherwise will bring confusion and uncertainty. The more circles we consistently work in this order to perfection, will bring us clarity and closer to Deity, thus bringing us peace and eternal Joy.

XXIV…Ideology & Absoluteness

A. Ideology too many times make us narrow and close mindedness that we start dealing in Absoluteness. This will be always be wrong as you need to be perfect to deal in Absolute and Deity has exclusive rights to perfection in any/all things! For this same reason, lack of perfection, we should not/cannot judge others.

XXV…The Greatest Distraction

A. Jealousy, Hatred, and Anger DEPRIVES the mind its ability to think clearly and the heart its most precious gift…LOVE!!!

XXVI…..Lying…Devil’s greatest tool because it denies us the opportunity to change, thus stunting our growth and progress.  The Devil is most miserable because he cannot grow or progress and want the same for us, so we can be miserable and frustrated like him.

XXVII..The greatest Motivation is personal growth.

A. Whenever or whatever we are doing spiritually or temporally, whether it be exercise, reading a good book, learning something new, or performing an unselfish deed, we experience and encounter a euphoric and exhilarated feeling. We feel good because we are growing and increasing in scope. It is contagious because the more we do it, the better we feel and we crave and hunger to perpetuate this special feeling.


A. Is the enemy and antithesis of success. It stops us from exploring possibilities and stunts our growth. Grandpa Soliai always told me, “fear no one or anything, except the Lord, even if they take your life it will only be once, but with the Lord you can live forever and accomplish and everything you desire”

XXIX…Compartmentalize Your Thought Process

A. Do not ignore any problems that come your way, rather put them into a file like the computer and go through the R.A.W. (#XVII) process. If you don’t have any solution to solve that particular problem, filed it away and come back to it at a later time. Do not linger or add that to the next problem because you will be over whelmed by all the problems being bunched together. Treat each problem separately.***

XXX…The Lord’s order is absolute

A. All things are subject to change, except the Lord wills it. The order by which we come into our families are done by the Lord. One member can be the strongest, another the wealthiest, and another the smartest and so forth and just as easily can changed with illness, financial calamity, mental disorder, etc., but the order by which we come into to our families are the Lord’s will only. No one can change that. The same is true with the Quorum of the Twelve and especially the President of His Church, the Lord chooses the order. Peace and harmony will be, with more families, if they recognize the Lord’s order. Of course, the oldest needs to be reminded to lead like King Benjamin and Latter Day Prophets (Love & Compassion with Meekness and Humility), rather than like, compassionless, and immoral King Noah.

XXXI…..Trust the Lord completely

A. He is perfect, as is His love. He will never forsake us. Human frailties and choices, sometimes, draw us into confusion and despair and away from Him. If we repent, He will always be there with open arms to welcome us back. Doubts & fear will be eliminated. That’s real and tangible security, comfort, and peace.

XXXII…Eternal Perspective

A. Life is Eternal and we live in an imperfect world. Our problems, always have to be taken from this eternal perspective. We have to chip away at it a little at a time. It’s line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little there a little concept and process. To do otherwise will fill us with anxiety, frustration, and may eventually overwhelmed us.

XXXIII….We Don’t Know Everything, but We Know Enough*
(Start Something, Positive)

A. We know Our Father in Heaven loves us with a perfect love and He will never, ever forsake us. It is against His character and everything He is.

“Obedience to the above principles (CSW) or disciplines and practicing them will be a solid foundation in anyone’s journey. It is enough to start and sustain us on/in the road to Peace, Joy, and freedom”. That much, we know for sure!!!

XXXIV…Proverb 16:32  He that is slow to aanger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city. Grandpa Soliai paraphrase this to me many times, meaning ‘control your feelings and emotions, you rule and control your world’.


    1. Always try to figure out new and better ways of doing any and all things. It will improve your RESULTS
    2. Understanding and Living All of the above will bring us the desired RESULTS, because nothing else matters!!!

Important, Vital, & Key Scriptures

Humility & Faith will Bring His Grace;   Either 12:27
27 And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and havefaith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.

Recognize / Avoid Distractions and Listen for Inspirations;   I King 19:11-12
11 And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord. And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake:

12 And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.

All Good Deeds and Thought come from God;   Moroni 7:13
13 But behold, that which is of God inviteth and enticeth to do agood continually; wherefore, everything which inviteth and benticeth to do cgood, and to love God, and to serve him, is dinspired of God.

How to Accomplish ALL things!!!

Any and Everything is possible in/with God.  He created the Heaven, the Earth, and the Universe, including mankind. We need to ‘Hear Him!!!

‘There’s a Solution to any/every problem and the Lord has all the solutions’.  We NEED to be Meek and Humble;  HAVE Faith, Trust, & Believe;  BLOCK OUT Any and All the Distractions and LISTEN to His Still Small Voice’   FOLLOW and PRACTICE these Principles/Values and We will FIND the Solutions to any/all of our Problems!!!

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